A sickness within

Mortal confines;

A body abused

Too many times;

An illness that spreads

From one’s own mind,

Nausea induced

To death inclined;

Vomit the soul,


Let the mind die.


Author’s Note:

A hangover is no fun.  On top of this, I’m sick of everything.  An extreme feeling of nausea came over me that made me want to vomit not only my stomach’s contents, but all of my insides out as well.  At that moment, I lost my appetite for everything, including life.  It happens.  We all feel sick for one reason or another, and we all get sick of something.  I’m currently facing a steep decline in work, and that will result in a pretty lousy income for this next month.  I’m sick of this job, and barely getting by.  I’m sick of doubting myself and letting life pass me by.  Overcoming these things aren’t easy, especially with past wounds.  I’ve recently opened up and shared a glimpse into my past that still haunts me today, leaving a tender spot vulnerable in the hopes that I can begin to heal.  Perhaps in time I will, and I can finally start making progress in life.  This dark hole of sickness won’t disappear on its own, but it’s my hole and mine alone.

Is there anything that’s making you feel sick?


Author: mynameisdespair


14 thoughts on “Sick”

  1. I’ve felt that before. Well… Not a hangover. But soul-sick, yes. The same thing, again and again; a seemingly eternal limbo… It drains you, and fills you instead with something stagnant and diseased. That is my sickness: a season that never changes. A night that never ends. That is, until I learn to pull aside the curtains and look out the window. 😛

    Liked by 3 people

  2. As you could see from my latest CW post, I, too, am struggling. Probably not as bad as you are, though.

    What I find myself doing is building up strength to a point where I say: “To hell with it” and move on from the sickness. The thing is that I don’t move onto greener pastures. Instead, I move into purgatory, hoping that one day I will find the answer, or that the light will shine. Sometimes I see glimpses of a bright light, but darkness follows closely behind.

    I felt nauseous just the other day. It surprised me, because that rarely happens. I think it’s because I’m currently sick of everything and everyone. Including myself. And I see that as a problem. It might sound selfish, but I usually take decent care of myself. I know when to stop and focus on me. But I haven’t done that in a while. And because I don’t nourish myself, I find it harder to cope with other things.

    Also, working/ dealing with people on a hangover sucks, which is the only reason that stops me.

    I sympathize with you, but I am utterly helpless and helping people get out of these states. I’d just recommend focusing on yourself for a moment. Letting your body and mind catch a break. Without it, everything else will crumble.

    Liked by 3 people

    1. Taking care of yourself isn’t selfish at all. In a sense it can be selfless, for if you take care of yourself it’s possible to take care of others (which it isn’t otherwise)

      Liked by 3 people

    2. I still need to catch up on a few posts. The hard part about building up the strength for me is that it’s being sapped every day to a point where I’ll gradually feel weaker. Not always, as you can see I’ve made it this far, but enough to get stalled again and again. Those last words – you’re very right. I’ll try to find that break. Thank you.

      Liked by 1 person

  3. Hey. The post was amazing because there was so much real emotion in it.
    Seems like you’re going through a really hard time. I relate to this as I too, at some level, am going through this.
    I think this is the time to introspect and find out what you really want to do.
    Sending loads of love to you.
    I hope everything is better soon.
    Best of luck, N.

    Liked by 1 person

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